Helping yourself feel safe

[dancingfish]

It sounds like such a simple thing, until you're in the middle of not feeling safe and finding it hard to reassure yourself that you are. Wrapping myself in a blanket helps. So does checking to see if I'm comfortable, or if my body is cold, hungry, thirsty. Playing some quiet music with maybe piano in, no words.

If you have any ideas or things you can share about feeling safe I'd love to hear them. Thank you.

[greendiva23]

Hi dancingfish,

What a great idea for a thread!
To feel safe I like to crawl under the covers of my bed and snuggle with my dogs. I sometimes play music or watch a favourite TV series, if I'm in the mood for it.

Looking forward to reading about some of the other techniques people use:)

Love, Greendiva

[Butterfly Q]

I cuddle a trusted soft toy.

If I'm out and about I try to make sure I have a piece of card that reminds me that I'm safe it varies at times. The card reminds me:

- You are ok
- Take a deep breath
- Check you phone if you need to know where you are
- You are safe

The whole card thing can have anything written on it.

I hope that helps a little bit.

Butterfly Q

[dragonfly]

My cats really soothe me. I love the sound of their purring. Another thing I do that feels good is to fill a hot water bottle with hot water and get under the covers in bed and hug the bottle.

dragonfly

[hopeful]

I get under the covers in bed and snuggle up, the warmth helps me feel safe. I have some old teddies that I cuddle too.

great thread

hopeful

[dancingfish]

Ah thanks everyone. Heh, I do have a stuffed toy that's just the right size to hug too, sometimes forget to reach out for something. I'll try to remember the hot water bottle. The piece of card is a really good idea for when not at home, too! Perhaps if I create one while I'm feeling safe and snuggled up, it can help by reminding me of when I wrote it as well.

[Shine]

This is a great post! I have something for each of the senses; something to smell, touch, taste, see and hear. Thy all have associations to good memories - it's as rewarding getting them together as it is using them to feel safe

[quixote]

dancingfish,
Great thread! I felt safe yesterday visiting with my friend.
quixote

[Couragetoday]

Hi everyone,
I struggle with feeling safe as well in dark moments. I too use the wrapped up tight in a blanket with a stuffie technique! I also make a point to lay somewhere other than my bedroom as this feels safer to me.
I also gently ask myself to observe 10 breaths before doing or acting on anything and it amazes me how at times this helps calms things, even if only for a moment.
I also have been using essential oils. I especially love lavender. I have no ties to this from the past so as I am smelling it, I remind myself that I have to be safe, in the present, as this smell was not a part of my past. (I wear a small piece of jewelry that carries this scent).
Living with DID, sometimes I find it helpful to speak individually to each part, reminding each one that we are in the present, and safe. Or, I ask them if they would prefer to leave and go to their already established safe places.
I too have a list of strategies written down in a list on my phone so they are always on me. It's so easy to forget in a moment (or long moments) of struggles. I'd be lying if I said my strategies are especially effective- it doesn't make anything go away, but sometimes helps make it through the moment(s).
Thanks for the thread - always in need of different coping strategies and look forward to learning from each of you.

[BrokenButterflyWings]

my heating pad and my dog help me feel better...and hot chocolate