Introduction

[mattakadaredevil]

Hi, I'm new here. I've wanted to be a part of a support group about abuse for decades. I did do a ptsd trauma focused group for two months based on the VA strategies. It helped a little bit.

I struggle with abuse from my past- physical, sexual, emotional, psyçhological, and spiritual from multiple offenders in childhood. I married a man who became abusive. We divorced. I was raped as an adult as well as being sexually assaulted by my boss. I don'tthink just mentioning that should trigger anyone so i left it at no triggers.

Ive been in and out, mostly out of therapy for decades. I do have a regular psychiatrist and take meds. I've been assigned a new therapist from my insurance but she only sees you once every 4 to 6 weeks which I don't think is enough. I met with a therapist outside my insurance that has weekly availability and a sliding scale and I'll start with him in a couple weeks.
I've been in hospital, iop, or php consistently over the last year and a half. This is my first week without that kind of support except for my birthday week which my husband took off and spent with me.

Because of my suicidal ideation over the last year and a half, I feel more vulnerable. I'm diagnosed with cPTSD, addiction, anxiety, depression with psychotic features, and borderline personality disorder. I look forward to being here and listening, supporting, processing, and growing- mattakadaredevil

[Crow]

Hi mattakadaredevil,

Well done for taking the step to join isurvive. Took me a long time too but I have so far found it to be a great place of support, listening and somewhere I can ask 'silly' questions and not feel judged, but understood.
Hope you find this to be a helpful part of your healing journey.

Crow

[Serenity]

Hi and welcome, mattakadaredevil. I'm sorry for the reasons, but glad you are here.

With care,
Serenity

[heavenlydove]

Hi Mattakadaredevil,

Welcome to the forum. Sounds like you have gone through a lot in your life. Sorry you are going through some suicidal ideation at present. I really hope you will find this place helpful to you. I think you'll find people here will understand where you are coming from as many have gone through hard things similar to you too. It is a place I am sure you will not be judged. Glad you are taking your recovery into your own hands and starting new therapy soon. Good luck with that.

[Jonesy]

Hi mattakadaredevil

Hi, I'm new here. I've wanted to be a part of a support group about abuse for decades.

Welcome. So very glad you found us

[dragonelle]

hi, i'm new too - welcome.

[coconuts]

Welcome...hope you find here the support you need. Its a good place to find understanding and acceptance. It seems there is always someone here who gets it.

Coconuts