back for a visit... glad to see you all again

[still_standing]

hi all,

been doing ok. in grad school now, second year to get a masters in counseling psych and hope to be an LPC working with a population of people just like all of us. i feel called to this and to vollunteer to be a child advocate, which i hope to also begin when i graduate.

i finished my last research paper for the semester last night... proud of it because of the topic which is; Mandatory Reporting: “It Depends” on the Law... it is a strong argument for taking an absulute approach to mandatory reporting any and all suspected abuse b/c it is the law. it was one scary class to listen to my teacher and fellow students discuss circumstances that might keep them from reporting (mainly to protect the client's trust).... so i took the oportunity to tech the classroom about the laws and the need to look beyond the offender and/or the co-dependant family member, and to think of the child and the long term effects of abuse on all involved. anyway, i like school but i'm really worn out...

i took a couple art therapy courses during undergrad and the process of learning methods brought about new needs for me to deal with... back to counseling i went. got a really nice t who specializes in truma and recovery and she does some EMDR too. my first time to experience EMDR... not sure what i think about it yet.

so tired, like i said. dealing with coming into my own 100% sellf care... told my dh that it is about time since no one else has done a good job with that before now! proud of myself for that.

well, i am going to relax in the cafe' and i hope you can join me just as you are for today.

lovingly,
still

[Beachlady]

Hi Still Standing,
So good to see you here and see you doing so well!!! Congrats on school (we are in similar fields) and on educating your teacher and classmates!!!!! And even better, on taking good care of you
Beachlady

[still_standing]

hello Beachlady, nice to be greeted by you :O)

ty for offering your congratulations, means a lot. very cool we are working to help others to thrive! i am certain you are gifted in your field

so catch me up, how have you been, if ok to ask?

anyone else feel free to answer as well.

~still

[Beachlady]

Hi Still Standing,
Very OK to ask, thanks. Working hard at work and therapy; 2012 has been a very up and down tough year. One of my kids had surgery (all is well now) and I've had lots of shifts in therapy to deal with as well as a new boss to adjust to (that was a really good change, fortunately) and continue to get more memories.... but it's good to be back here, and good to see you. Hope you continue to thrive, and I know you will be excellent as both a therapist and an advocate
Beachlady

[Harmony]

Welcome back still standing,

You are always a welcome visitor here. Congrats on continuing your education.

warmly,
Harmony

[VAC]

Still-Standing,

How brave you are! Such good coming to help others out of such pain....

You will do great things, I believe.

VAC

[still_standing]

hi all :O)

so nice of you to say Beachlady, i do hope i am of help to others. sounds like you are quite busy! how do you deal w talking to others when dealing with your own issues? i am afraid to get to my practicum b/c i am processing so much now...

thank you for the warm welcome and congrats, Harmony, good to see you here. hope all is well with you.

hello VAC, nice to see you, and ty for the belief in me, that means so much to me! about me being brave reminds me of one of my favorite quotes; “Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow. ” ― Mary Anne Radmacher
in that way we are all brave... and i know that is how i got to where i am and will get to where i am going...

thanks for the good company and kindness.
lovingly,
still

[Beachlady]

Hi Still Standing,
I am sure you do help others, maybe in ways you don't even see as well as the ones you do... I think to be honest that I dissociate some when I am working, in a positive way, so I am very focused on the client (I am not a T, so it is a bit different, though I do work in a closely related profession and deal very directly with lots of trauma) and my own processing is sort of "on hold".... I also make very certain to have specific things I do, rituals in a way, to put myself in that "professional" space when I get to work, and then put away the trauma I listen to and deal with when working and allow the "personal" to come back... I think you will probably find that when you are focusing intently on the client, that will put you into that role.... but it makes the self-care much more important later, due to vicarious trauma issues as well as our own stuff being triggered, and that can easily hit hard once the work is done with the client... and you are already working hard on that piece (which I need to get better at!!)
I think there are a LOT of survivors in the helping professions, so you and I are not alone in dealing with that balancing act. Having colleagues and supervisors you trust is vital, I think; when I have an interaction that bothers me I have a colleague who knows I am a survivor (not too many gory details, but she knows enough) and I can go to her and get perspective, and just vent. And she can ask me where my view is coming from, which is a good reminder not to rely too much on my own history when dealing with a case, but to balance that as well.... and part of practicum, if the supervisors are good, is helping you develop your own good ways of creating that balance. So there's my very long-winded answer to your question I hope a little of it helps
I LOVE that quote about courage!!! It is so good to have you back here, and I am sending tons of good wishes for your practicum
Beachlady

[still_standing]

ty, Beachlady, that was really good explaination of what works for you. i think some of it i can already relate to... the routine to get into work reminds me of what i did as a nurse coming on shift. i already experienced vicarious trauma thru an actual interview i did for my grief course... that was rough b/c i didn't know what was happening to me and neither did my proffessor or even my t! i figured it all out when i read about it in my textbook!

i do hope i can connect w ppl i work with durring practicum and internship and esp after i get a permanent possition; i think that is very important, too.

i am glad we connected here, Beachlady, talking about this has helped! btw i am not enroled in practicum until summer, need to begin looking for a place this spring.

ttys,
still

[Beachlady]

Hi Still_Standing,
Vicarious trauma IS still trauma; I am so glad you recognized it!!! Also glad that you already have some strategies for dealing with those issues, because I think that vicarious trauma - burnout issues really impact more people than the profession would like to admit.
I am glad we connected here too, and that talking about this has helped. It can be such a tricky balance, to be both survivor and professional...if you would ever like to talk more, just feel free to get my e-mail from Jonesy, or post more if that is better for you... it is great to talk to someone here in a similar job situation
Beachlady