still going on

This is a place for old members to come and share how their healing journeys have progressed.
Its also a place for those members to reconnect and share their experiences.

Moderators: Harmony, ajei

Post Reply
VAC
Member
Posts: 706
Joined: Wed Jul 27, 2011 1:16 am

Re: still going on

Post by VAC » Sun Mar 08, 2020 4:11 am

Hello,

I often dream...much of it is mental run off; sometimes it is very symbolic and also literal.

I have taken to afternoon naps several days a week, which are most refreshing to me. After a lifetime of insomnia it is a gift.

I rarely have dreams of a sexual nature, but today had one that was not graphic, and I won't go into details, but it explained to me the mechanics of generational incest. I have considered before that this was possibly a plague in my family for some time.

The essentials of this dream as I had it were a victim, an abuser both riding on the back of an enabler. That is something I have seen before but it was just so plain in this dream. It was unsettling and I have been very quiet the rest of the day.

I thank God that this stopped and pray it will never cross my generations again.

I confided in a relative part of our struggle as a family, and it unnerved them. They have been distant since then. I know he spoke to another one of my few cousins. She is older than me but told me that we should all get together and talk about "our secrets".

I am wired to mourn for loss and heartache...it is a part of love and life, and quiet honestly, I think it is a personally healthy thing mentally.

Today was sort of like forensic pathology and I did take a nose dive for a couple of hours. I do so enjoy life. I never banked on being old or knowing what I know now, but even so, this has been a journey that is not yet done.

There is so much the darkness would like to be fatal. I refuse to be killed anymore. I will be comforted and healed and will try to comfort others.

I believe this is the positive inheritance of survivors. WE live.
Last edited by Harmony on Sun Mar 08, 2020 6:47 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Reason: edited from ST to MT, as some triggering detail is included

VAC
Member
Posts: 706
Joined: Wed Jul 27, 2011 1:16 am

Re: still going on

Post by VAC » Mon Apr 13, 2020 2:59 am

Hello,

Our nation is shut down and the sick seem to be spreading around the country....I have never seen this in all my years. It seems we are on the brink of tomorrow.

I have been much calmer. We are shut in for the most part going out only once a week or so. People are hurried, tense.

For the first time in my life, I saw two soldiers walking up our street nonchalantly, just boys really.

Our schools and most businesses are shut down. We have been able to do some of our business online.

I wish peace and safety on each one of you.

V.

coconuts
Member
Posts: 3379
Joined: Mon Mar 28, 2016 2:34 am

Re: still going on

Post by coconuts » Mon Apr 13, 2020 4:08 am

It's a very surreal experience vac. Unique in that it's one so many around the entire world can relate to right now.

It's difficult in is own way. And anxiety producing and triggering in other ways. I remind myself it's just a moment in time. Before we know it, it will be a "remember when" story

Wishing you and yours the best VAC

Harmony
Site Admin
Site Admin
Posts: 5448
Joined: Tue Nov 29, 2011 8:10 pm

Re: still going on

Post by Harmony » Wed Apr 15, 2020 4:24 pm

Dear VAC,

Nice to see you write. Meanwhile the world seems to have calmed down. I see neighbors helping one another. People out walking. The air is cleaner and the rivers are recovering from pollution.

There are always at least two sides to every issues. May you continue to live peacefully and calmly in your own safety. The world will heal one way or another. Most nations have put down their weapons with one notable exception. That makes peace amidst the plague. How odd eh? We are hunkered in for now.

Stay well,
Harmony

VAC
Member
Posts: 706
Joined: Wed Jul 27, 2011 1:16 am

Re: still going on

Post by VAC » Sat May 09, 2020 7:34 am

Hello,

it is very late/early for me.....I wish we would have an isurvive convention. Would like to look everyone in the face and say thankyou.

Amazing short, hazy vignettes of images and sounds. I could never bear to be mocked or laughed at....now I think I know the root. We are well enough. This has been a halcyon Spring. So wonderful.

Peace to each of you,

V.
Last edited by Harmony on Sat May 09, 2020 4:53 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Reason: edited from MT to NT due to no specific triggering material nor language.

there
Member
Posts: 8027
Joined: Mon Aug 15, 2011 12:41 am

Re: still going on

Post by there » Tue May 26, 2020 2:10 pm

Hi, VAC,
I like how you put it—-“a halcyon spring”.
The spring here has been amazing, too, and never more welcome.
“Courage is an inner resolution to go forward despite obstacles." Rev Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

Post Reply

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest