To be honest, I have never liked her much because of her vices. She does take a TON of medicine for her issues, but she also (from time to time) will drink alcohol, which I think she shouldn't do AT ALL, because I'm sure she can't with all the pills she takes. Also, she smokes weed all the time. She used to do it all over her house, until I told her she wouldn't see her grand daughter again if I even smelled it. Since then she just goes into a little room all the time.
I have actually had to put up with A LOT. So many times that she said she would do this or that, and never do, and then never apologize. She was late to my daughter's 1st birthday. She left me in a parking lot for over 1.5 hrs waiting on her, and then she never even came, even though I called her and talked to her 3 times. The last time I was like "Really? I've been here for over an hour, sitting on the concrete, how long more?!" Her "Don't yell at me" and she hung up on me. She also never apologized for that.
I feel like I have tried so hard to put up with all these things because I just wanted my daughter to feel like she had a family. I used to cry when I was little because I didn't have any grandparents. But maybe it's like you said... maybe if I actually had a loving, protective mother, a mother who didn't spend my birthdays and Christmas drunk, maybe I wouldn't have minded no having more family or having Christmas just the 2 of us.
I kind of feel like a failure. Not only can't I count on my abusive family, I also chose another abusive family. I basically feel like I gave my daughter the worst family situation
.