I know what you mean, I try to make sense of many things that really just don't and won't ever make logical sense. You wrote that some things don't make sense to you, did you mean about my post? If so, I've written much more in the private section we have here, might help you understand my situation better if it was confusing. Abuse is definitely illogical and certainly painful. I'm sorry you're having nightmares, I don't have dreams anymore either. I also know what it feels like to be feeling all those things while sleeping and awake, I'm sorry you're going through that. It's very likely that man who was robbing you in May triggered that same energy from your mother, I can see why it would. I hope you're safe now, did you contact the police? I do agree love could be worn like a suit of armor, that's really well said. I really don't know why such horrible things happen and continue to, either. You are valued, respected and cared about here and I'll look for your posts if you feel like sharing more
