Tough time but healing

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Joined: Fri Oct 19, 2018 9:51 pm

Tough time but healing

Post by Magpie » Fri Mar 06, 2020 11:50 pm

Feel a bit numb tonight I’m not gonna lie. A bit of relief but hurt and pain too.

I sent a message to my abuser after she messaged me basically saying my son was rude and disrespectful, and that I should have told him to “sit up and listen to her”?!??
She said she didn’t send any messages to upset me but she felt like she was damned if she did or damned if she didn’t tell me how she was feeling. Let’s get this straight......about a child who doesn’t respond to her questions.

I called her out, I sent her a message saying she was controlling, I said she shouldn’t be taking her frustration of his behaviour out on him, but to tell me instead.

She’s now saying she wants to have a “break” from our relationship as family members, she is finding it all to upsetting and stressful.

I know I am angry and shouldn’t be bitter but it felt good to say to her that she is controlling. Did it hit a nerve? Yes I think so.

Bit sad but also relieved tonight, and a bit proud of myself for standing up to what is right. Calling someone out on bullying behaviour.

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Joined: Mon Mar 28, 2016 2:34 am

Re: Tough time but healing

Post by coconuts » Sat Mar 07, 2020 1:37 am

That does sound like a lot of conflicting emotions to take in. There's such a level of hurt and strength in such decisions and interactions. Standing up for yourself can feel so empowering and a bit scary.

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Joined: Tue Jul 19, 2011 1:44 pm

Re: Tough time but healing

Post by Jonesy » Sat Mar 07, 2020 6:08 pm

Hey Magpie

Feeling all kinds of proud of you. That took courage, and now you have a real chance at redefining boundaries.
Be gentle with yourself.
You are important


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Joined: Wed Oct 24, 2012 2:14 am

Re: Tough time but healing

Post by quixote » Sun Mar 08, 2020 12:42 am

Good job. It's not easy to stand up to abusers, but you did it. You have the right to speak up because he's your son.

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