still going on

[Fleur]

Hello VAC

A frightened docile kitten is one thing, but hissing cats at your dog -- agree, that is not desirable

Yes, pet owners need to be responsible
Which jogs my memory - put collar back on my cat

Read what you wrote to Lostboy
Thank you, really needed reminder

[VAC]

Hello,

I have been quite busy....sad to say the traveling does not agree with me as it once did, but I do love to drive.

I know it is not my imagination, but the folks on the big highways drive with little regard for safety.

Big accidents cause by reckless driving are commonplace now.

Senseless loss.

I have done something today that is most uncommon for me.....been a sleep and rest day.

I want all of you to know that I am deeply sorry for all the hurt and suffering most of you on this site have known.....I often think about it. One of the things that has kept me since I was a kid, was knowing it was not supposed to be and did not have to be.

That may sound dumb, but that belief grounded me, even though it happened to me.

We all harbor some hope of a better day and a different world.

That is meant to be. Even a stray dog would choose a steak over a bone.

I am, at least, as smart and deserving of survival as a stray dog....

Woof.....

[Fleur]

Hello VAC

You do deserve to survive

Agree that motorists often do some weird things
Driving for others can only go so far
May you remain safe on the roads

Unpleasant events happen, therefore we suffer
It was not originally designed that way......
Not dumb to think about positive world

Wishing you a lovely peaceful day

[VAC]

Fleur,

One day it will be as it was planned from the beginning. We will see it.

V.

[Fleur]

Indeed, VAC , so might it be as you say, Amen

[VAC]

Hello to All,

The last several days have been a down time for me....I pushed myself for three weeks. Actually I pushed myself for several decades.

I am tired and fighting sleep.

I have peace in this journey, though. I met recently with an old friend who was in the area for an appearance and a book signing: I can tell we are getting older. It is the first time I was ever with him in public and he was not recognized.

He is moving out of one domain into another, a whole new thing for him. It was good to see him. I may never see him again: different paths.

Neither of us are spring chickens anymore.

I talked to him about being a dumb guy. Guys just seem to be dumb when life is right in front of them.

I can be a very wise man. I can also be an uber dumb guy.

I am somewhat distraught about my fleeting, but dogged, willingness to reexamine my past.

Not too long ago, a local man who is a leader in out county, asked me out to lunch. We were eating and chatting. His back was to the door. An older woman with very short hair was leaving the restaurant and pointed and laughed at me. She did this twice.

I really have no overweaning social graces that would have prevented me from confronting her, except I just don't care. I know, I think, what her issues were/are with me. I was thinking today about how in my face life has always been and how I coped with it. I was at a dance when I was a kid. People were making fun of my date and I, just to be asses......

.....in true faction. We got up on the stage and danced alone. People pelted us.....I just smiled at her and thanked her. I have been in police raids, police assisted visits with CDC investigators when I was older. I got the same kind of thing since I was a child....

I just go on....
I wanted to call the old wench a mindless heifer, but decided I had to much class to deal with the likes of her.

I did ask the man with whom I was having lunch if a woman fitting her description was part of his organization.....he and I are due for a lunch again, and it will be the same place.

I have always had to deal with this.....

I was called names constantly. I did not know what they meant. Finally as a precocious 12 year old in 7th grade, I looked them up, went to the library and did a term paper on it. This was 1965.....the County Superintendent strong-armed me in the classroom where my paper was posted on a wall with everyone else's. He threatened me.....He took down my term paper and crammed it into my hands and hissed at me to do another paper.

I had a 100 average in that class.

I made sure my first car was unique.....not another one like it within fifty miles. For you UK friends, it was a 1959 Triumph TR3. Dark British Racing Green, black interior, no windows. I wore a jaunty cap. I smoked cigars. I was 14. The car cost $75.00

Wish I still had it.....

That need to be different from the zeitgeist of this region continues.....it is just me.

I am growing my hair long again, when I had told myself I am too old.

Not too old to be me.

I used to walk a lot.....it is not safe here now, and I really have little tolerance for the extreme heat...I miss it. The friends I have are precious to me. I stopped by and visited a cousin to try to get some info about my family....have not heard from them.....

So, the only logical thing for me to do is to somehow procure an old car like the one I had.....no more cigars. I will give my friends a ride. I may wear a jaunty hat. I may hire someone to get down to the truth about my family here.

AND......I don't care what people think about me. I have always attracted attention.

Tonight we were fortunate to be in the city in which our daughter and son in law live and had a meal together. I worked in the restaurant business for many years and can cook at home as well as any place we could go out to eat, and I am particular, but not a pain.

I also am really different.

My son in law quipped to the waiter that I was sometimes eccentric.

I looked at the waiter and my son in law and smiled and told him he was mistaken, that I am always eccentric, and only not so when I am off my game. I find a peculiar energy and comfort in not fitting in.

Lemminglessness assaults our world. May I be given the strength and power to always paddle upstream.

Just thinking.

[Sheep]

VAC,

Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I think a lot of us survivors feel that we are really different. It is growth that you can grow long hair again realizing that you are not too old to be yourself, is it not?

Still here reading,

Sheep

[there]

I liked reading your latest here, VAC. I admire you.

[VAC]

There,

Thank you.

V.

[there]

You're most welcome, VAC!