Hello?

A discussion area for anyone who loves a survivor and needs some support of their own.

Moderators: Jonesy, Ashia

the husband
Member
Posts: 411
Joined: Sat Jul 23, 2011 6:11 am

Hello?

Post by the husband » Mon Jul 14, 2014 6:02 am

I've been here quite awhile, chattering away to myself for the most part recently.

Could there be so few Loved Ones happening by? Have I scared away the ones that have come through with my opinions? Am I scaring off potential members with the epic "story" thread?

Harmony
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 4119
Joined: Tue Nov 29, 2011 8:10 pm

Re: Hello?

Post by Harmony » Mon Jul 14, 2014 2:04 pm

Hi husband,

Glad to see you starting a new thread. Nice to do that once and while. Not everyone wants to read a book some like me appreciate shorter articles. Thanks for being here.


listening,

Harmony

the husband
Member
Posts: 411
Joined: Sat Jul 23, 2011 6:11 am

Re: Hello?

Post by the husband » Mon Jul 14, 2014 9:44 pm

Thanks for the reply and feedback.

I had the idea that I would not clutter the landscape by starting a bunch of threads, but perhaps that thread has become too much. I'll give some thought to a few focused topics. Communication, frustration, sex, attending to one's own issues and attenting to one's own needs are recurring themes.

recover
Member
Posts: 16157
Joined: Thu Jul 21, 2011 12:50 pm

Re: Hello?

Post by recover » Tue Jul 15, 2014 2:40 am

hi the husband,
its been quiet here lately, i don't know why. i am sorry you feel alone here. its been quieter than usual on other forums too. i don't come to this forum much so that's why i haven't said much. usually too caught up just trying to maintain my well-being as best as i can...
i think you are a really caring and understanding husband, i really do.
with much much support,
recover

the husband
Member
Posts: 411
Joined: Sat Jul 23, 2011 6:11 am

Re: Hello?

Post by the husband » Wed Jul 16, 2014 12:39 am

Thanks recover.

I know what you mean about trying to maintain your well-being. I sometimes think perhaps I should participate more in the other forums but sometimes it's just too much for the moment.

Jonesy
Director
Director
Posts: 10565
Joined: Tue Jul 19, 2011 1:44 pm

Re: Hello?

Post by Jonesy » Wed Jul 16, 2014 3:28 pm

Hi the husband

I think however you want to post is just fine, whether on your longer thread or on new ones. Your voice here has been so very important to many of us and I hope you will continue to share as you can. Yes, it has been kinda quiet of late - but this happens and remember it's also summer for most members.
You are important
Email: jonesy@hush.com

ajei
Site Admin
Site Admin
Posts: 3308
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2012 1:50 am

Re: Hello?

Post by ajei » Wed Jul 16, 2014 9:15 pm

Good to see you the husband.

ajei

mustard seed
Member
Posts: 1521
Joined: Mon Sep 22, 2014 8:49 am

Re: Hello?

Post by mustard seed » Tue Jan 06, 2015 3:48 am

Hello Husband,
Bit late in this thread because I don't drop in much.
Wondering too if ok to post/ask questions, get the other side, etc...
I like some of the topics you suggested, just never sure where to post here, a topic might be useful?
Came today, looking for you.
Happy to have found you.

Something about your voice, your dedication to your wife and to yourself, your relationship insights, experience and wisdom are challenging and soothing (?) to me; not sure how to describe except that while usually suspicious of men in general, I find something in you that is sound, on solid ground and I feel safe.
I'm really interested in what you say.

Happy New Year by the way; hoping good things for you and yours in 2015.
ms

the husband
Member
Posts: 411
Joined: Sat Jul 23, 2011 6:11 am

Re: Hello?

Post by the husband » Tue Jan 06, 2015 7:40 pm

Hi mustard seed

Any topics, questions or comments would be welcome. I'm convinced there is much to be gained from learning from each other here. I learn from other's comments and from answering other's questions.

For instance, the other discussion in this forum is reminding me to make caring for myself a priority - something I struggle with and have let slip in the past month or so. I often go and read the survivor forums to remind myself how to look at a given situation from my wife's point of view.

I appreciate your comments about safety. Challenging can be helpful if done gently and with the right intent, but too much is not helpful. Soothing is good, but I have learned from my wife that there is a point where soothing can be perceived as creepy and seductive. I try to find the middle ground. I also think it's helpful to strive to be vulnerable here so that I'm not a bystander.

mustard seed
Member
Posts: 1521
Joined: Mon Sep 22, 2014 8:49 am

Re: Hello?

Post by mustard seed » Tue Jan 06, 2015 10:25 pm

I agree with everything you said.
It's difficult here when seeking a response from someone specific, wish we had a way to message individuals.
I appreciate you, does your wife know you are on here and does she interact in any way? Is anything helpful?

Post Reply

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest