Fleur's 2018 thoughts

[Fleur]

I was a bit puzzled why my birthday wasn't listed. Not that it was special or significant. Then when I went to alter some info I discovered it was all gone. Don't know why … does anyone?

So embarrassed using train bathroom on the way home. I successfully locked the door so people couldn't get in. However a man who evidently needed the convenience urgently gave a running commentary about what I was doing in there

He didn't know my Sh effect meant a mess to clean up. It was unexpected as I have been behaving myself in recent nights

It was a lovely sunny day in major city but my oh my was the wind biting. By the time we were almost back the rain started. Seemed to have been wet quite a while. Pity as I put out washing in clear warm weather and expected sunshine to last. Left wet things on line. Hoping breeze and sun will dry everything tomorrow (as in after dawn today)

Pdoc got an idea of how I react to loud noises … there were sirens as well as raised voices in the street just outside the office we used. I jumped and apparently looked haunted according to her


Really tired of all the ramifications Of ptsd etc from less than great childhood. Life has been really f/d up in so many ways on all levels

Crazy thing …craving company I posted my profile on a couple of sites. Pity I cannot request a female friend as they are strictly woman seeking man and vice versa. A platonic friendship "without benefits" as is the jargon would be fabulous. Someone with whom to share a laugh over silly stuff.... Something so many survivors seem to mention. Just so bloody unfair

My face feels less painful. I can now smile with both sides of my mouth. Next bit is Thursday. Then two scopes on Friday. Oh joy

Eye exam shows beginning of cataracts I think in right eye. Anyhow only one affected. Then I heard that eyesight can be related to emotional aspects as much as incorrect posture and other factors. Myopia (short sight) is common in abused children. Some speculate perhaps we don't want to see the world clearly or we focus overly on things that are nearby. Whatever … seems another result from the yucky stuff

I remember Mental arithmetic whereby we students were supposed to only write question numbers and then the respective answers. I got them all wrong. My solution was to write out what I saw on the blackboard. In retrospect why didn't teachers pick up that I had trouble? When I finally used first pair of spectacles all the visual environment changed including how I perceived classrooms

Funny how my brother caused mother to request an opthomologist referral. We three were in the doctor's office and my brother challenged me to see the eye chart. He closed each eye in turn and read the bottom line. I did the same but even the big letter at the top was fuzzy. Going closer was no use. I forget why Mum had taken both of us without youngest child to Dr. Anyway that was when my sight difficulties were first picked up

It is about 2 am. I would prefer to be asleep

Bye for now

[victoria]

Hi Fleur. It's been a long time since I have been around, probably don't remember me as I was on sporadically but you always had some kind words for me and it helped. I was glad to see a familiar-- I guess not really face, but well you know what I mean. Was today your Birthday? If so, sending you good wishes and if not, sending them anyways (:

I'm sorry to hear about all of the medical issues you have to deal with, I truly hope they improve for you. I know you mentioned posting your profile on some sites to have company, just wanting friends. My husband actually made me sign up for this site called 'girlfriend social', thought I'd mention it. It's basically just a place for women to make other female friends-- no worries about dating or anything of the sort. I had been on to find people to hang out with nearby, and I did find a couple. But there are also lots looking to be online friends as well, so distance doesn't matter as much. Anyhow, thought I'd mention it in case it might be something you're looking for. Here's hoping that you have a better tomorrow.

Victoria

[there]

Great. Came back to find yesterday's post non-existent.
When is or was your birthday? Wishing you a very happy one!
Really good news that your face is feeling less painful and more mobile. Sounds like even though cataract not such a good thing, you are on top of your eye health.

I hope your sleep is getting better for you.
Gentle hug from me, if okay, and woof from Tula

[Jonesy]

Hi Fleur

Sending belated birthday wishes your way. Hope you were able to do something special for yourself.
The reason your birthday didn't show is because of the new GDPR regulations, sadly we can't use that feature any more on site

[Fleur]

Hello Victoria.... I am sorry you are correct I don't recall talking with you. I thank you so much for saying about girlfriend Social. Really appreciate your thoughtfulness


Hello there.... Really sorry about lost post. That has happened to me so many times. Thank you for hugs and the woof from Tula


Hello Jonesy ... Thank you for explanation. Agree that it is sad that site needs to change in order to comply with new regulations


For record my birthday was last Saturday

Today I had endoscopy. Minor procedure has had complications so instead of going to hostel for tonight then church before returning home tomorrow ... I am in hospital and although we thought only overnight it could be longer

Second cancer site looks really good according to wound nurse. However the first one seems to have become infected which is impacting vision

About to have IV antibiotics. Hopefully the small canula in hand manages to do the job as it took three times to find a decent non collapsing vein

More pain than I would like at this stage but it is what it is


Cheers

[Couragetoday]

I’m so sorry you are having to stay In hospital Fleur.
Really hoping you will be well enough to go home soon , that iv site holds up, and vision is restored.

Thinking of you,

Couragetoday

[Jonesy]

Hi Fleur

Also sending support, please know you’re in my thoughts

[iwillthrive]

Fleur,

Sending my support your way too. Take good care of yourself. iwt

[there]

Adding on my support and concern for a fast resolution and short hospital stay

[Fleur]

Really appreciate all your caring messages Couragetoday iwillthrive there Jonesy

Dr says take one day at a time but probably here until Monday

Soxy has a big fresh bowl of water. I gave him enough food to last through today. He will think he's starving but he has some size to reduce

Sister who is my next of kin phoned so that was great


May everyone have a pleasant weekend with high points